It’d be real cool if old men stopped looking for rape’s silver lining.

We have an epidemic in the US. I’m not talking about measles or the flu. What we have is a bunch of old men in our government telling women, “Buck up; being raped isn’t that bad.”

Well, maybe they aren’t saying that in so many words, but the implication remains when someone says something like “Obviously rape is awful. What is beautiful is the child that could come from this.”

Yes, that’s a real thing that a real person said. Delegate Brian Kurcaba from West Virginia recently mounted a defense for rape during a committee meeting discussing a statewide abortion ban. This committee decided for women that rape and incest aren’t good enough reasons to exempt them from a 20-week abortion ban.

West Virginia Delegate Brian Kurcaba

West Virginia Delegate Brian Kurcaba

This comes only two days after a Utah State Rep. Brian Greene said,

“If an individual has sex with their wife while she is unconscious … a prosecutor could then charge that spouse with rape, theoretically. That makes sense in a first date scenario, but to me, not where people have a history of years of sexual activity.

And we’re only two weeks removed from Lindsey Graham’s plea for “help to find a way out of this definitional problem with rape” because “need to find a way definitionally to not get us into a spot where we’re debating what legitimate is. That’s not the cause. We’re not here debating legitimate rape. We’re talking about saving babies at 20 weeks.”

Yeah. It’s all about how they can find a way around the rape exemption because fuck the victims, right? Then again, the right loves fucking vulnerable people, so it should come as no surprise that they’re debating now whether they need to debate later just what rape is.

I’m reminded of how anti-vaxxers downplay the severity of measles infections. “Sure, my child is really sick, but she’ll have lifetime immunity!” is no different than “Sure, rape is awful, but now you get to have a baby!” The point being that all women just want to have like a million babies, stay at home, and not interfere with what the men are doing because someone who can never be pregnant, who doesn’t know the definition of rape or how the female body even works (I’m looking at you, Todd Akin) is the perfect choice for discussing and deciding how women should be allowed to use their vaginas.

Fellow penis owners, I’d like to make a request of you. Stop. Just stop. Every time you try to put a positive spin on rape, you further alienate women and victimize rape survivors. When you take it upon yourselves to decide that a woman’s body is now a vessel for a future constituent (and we all know that’s the plan), you’re making sure that her rape experience is continued far beyond the rape itself. Sexual assault doesn’t have a silver lining. Stop trying to find one, you bastards

Some days, I’m so thankful for my Y-chromosome. I don’t know how women put up with the constant attacks on their humanity.

7 thoughts on “It’d be real cool if old men stopped looking for rape’s silver lining.

  1. Thank you for writing this! It’s disgusting the things these men have to say about rape. They act as if they can have an opinion about abortion when they would never have to have one. And they find it impossible that sexual abuse within a marriage exists?!? They are oblivious and just plain stupid.

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  2. He needs to also understand that, ‘obviously soddomy is awful. What is beautiful is the constipation relief that could come from it’.
    An I hope he needs a lot of relief, because he’s obviously full of shit.

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  3. My husband is the only other man I’ve ever heard espouse these beliefs. I’m sure there are others, but I’ve never heard them say it out loud. Thank you for saying it out loud.

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  4. I believe it is time for the law to take victims rights in hand. The only question that should ever be allowed to be asked of an “alleged” rapist is, “Did he/she do it?” (Let’s not forget that men get raped too and women can be rapists)

    Not, “was it consensual?”, did the victim, “ask for it?” or even, “did it hurt?”

    With today’s technology, it should be a given that an accused has the right to confront their accuser, only when doing so will not lead to further trauma or intimidation.

    Finally, I believe that each and every human being, be they male or female, should have the right to choose what happens to their own body. For making a rape victim give birth to a child that was conceived in rape is in itself an act akin to rape.

    Right-to-lifers need to get their heads out of the clouds and mind their own business and stop telling other people how to live their lives. On this over-populated, poverty ravished planet we live on there are already enough unwanted, starving children. No I am not saying that people without the resources should not have children. I am saying that no one who doesn’t want to, should ever have to go through bringing a child into this world.

    Thank you Bobby C for being a person who has a simple, intelligent, common sense approach to the world and for being someone who is willing to say it.

    Kathy W
    Sydney Australia

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  5. I’m really surprised that a website dedicated to reason takes this stance. The whole “rape exemption” is a logically inconsistent idea within the abortion debate. Either you believe a fetus is a human being, in which case it has a right to life as any other human being does, or you don’t, in which case the rights of the mother would control. (For the record, I’m in the latter camp). But, to take the position “I’m against abortion except in cases of rape” is basically saying “I believe a fetus is a human being with rights, unless it’s father was a rapist in which case it deserves the death penalty”. Sins of the father indeed! While I don’t agree with anti-abortion advocates in their premise that a fetus is a human being, at least I respect the logical consistency of those who say “all abortion is murder, no exceptions”. Those who would argue that abortion is murder unless the baby’s daddy was a rapist, in which case abortion is fine and dandy, are clearly not employing logical thinking.

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    • you are ranting about a statement that was never made. perhaps you believe the statement was implied, but this is actually a defense of the reasoning that abortion should be an option because rape victims can become pregnant. obviously there are more reasons it should be legal that are not discussed here, and nowhere in this does it say rape is the only reason for abortion.

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